In A Perfect Republican World: Return Of Slavery, Death Of Oprah

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In a perfect world every millionaire, and jet/yacht owner would pay no taxes (or at least 5 percent) while every middle-class American is on financial life support, gay people would be locked away in psych wards, Oprah would be stoned for being the modern anti-Christ, and Blacks would voluntarily return to the system of slavery—at least according to most Republicans.

The aforementioned caveats implicitly stem from rhetoric used by the Republican Party as of late, and as in most election seasons, the GOP’s inner loathing for all humanity has emerged to the forefront.

Republican presidential candidates Michele Bachmann and Rick Santorum recently signed a pledge in Iowa drafted by “The Family Leader,” a conservative group. The pledge said that if signed, the candidate will vow to uphold the most basic conservative values such as marriage between a man and woman, as well as stand firmly on the belief that African-American babies were better off during slavery because they were more “likely to be raised by his mother and father in a two-parent household than is an African-American born after the election of the USA’s first African-American President.”

Of course, the The Family Leader later retracted that language, but the damage was already done. Don’t back track now, say how you really feel. Word of advice for conservatives and Republicans: Leave race out of your political argumentation. You only make yourself come off as more of an arse, especially when you know nothing about the African-American family during slavery, or in any capacity for that matter.

In fact, the African-American family was far from intact during slavery. Children were auctioned off to slave owners, ripped away from their mother’s bosom and forced into child labor. And yet some conservatives believe that to be some kind of familial Utopia? If you’re going to bring up slavery, stick to the facts.

If you care so much about the African-American family, vote on policies that bring quality education to underprivileged communities, commit to funding recreational services for children who are engulfed in violence and drug wars. If you really care about the African-American family, and want to highlight their unique place in America, you wouldn’t question the need for affirmative action, or for Historically Black Colleges and Universities, and you certainly wouldn’t threaten to obliterate public assistance.

And then there’s the argument that single-parent households are somehow less regarded than two-parent households; that a child can’t possibly live a quality life if he or she is not raised by both parents. What world are they living in? Because it’s certainly not the real world.

But wait there’s more.

A pastor affiliated with potential 2012 presidential candidate, Rick Perry, called Oprah a “harbinger of the anti-Christ” who is “utterly deceived.” How in the world did Oprah get into the conversation? What makes her an anti-Christ?

I guess it’s the fact that she is supported by Americans of all creeds, ethnicities, and gender, or the fact that she is a billionaire who voluntarily gives millions of dollars back to the middle class–something Republicans find to be absurd. She’s an anti-Christ, alright.

But sadly, the real reason Oprah is targeted is because she publicly supports the president, and if you’re a Obama supporter you’re most certainly a cold-blooded, anti-Christian sadist. Right, Republicans?

It never cease to amaze me how a political party that claims to stand on Religious principles (which implies love for all), could spew so much garbage. Who mandated the Republican Party as the humane experts on what’s right or wrong? Republicans are far from perfect, and I wish they would stop preaching as if they are. Last time I checked the only one fit to judge was God himself. But what do I know? I’m not a conservative, religious absolutist.

Excuse me if I’m coming off a bit over the top, but this is the same tactic conservatives use when engaging political debate, and quite frankly, it’s getting old. The “I’m-holier-than-thou” approach to politics is deplorable, and until Republicans take themselves seriously, they will never garner my respect.

Say what you want about Democrats, but I’d rather support a caucus that stands on a platform of tolerance for all than one that stands on extreme, absolute detestation. Democrats, too, of course have their own issues, but nothing as condemning as the GOP.

No one has all of the answers, but if I have to live in a world designed by the Republican Party, I’ll be buying my first ticket to the moon.

*Note: These sentiments do not characterize every Republican, just most.

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