I couldn’t get a job to save my life and here I was with an expensive degree in my hand from the best “J-School” in the country and solid work experience behind me. But no one seemed to care. It probably didn’t help my cause that unlike many of my classmates who left NYC to accept jobs in smaller markets, I chose to stay and brave NYC and an extremely competitive job market with seasoned journalists. Again, nothing happened. Here’s what I didn’t do: panic. I’m lying, I did some, but then, I got focused.

My situation above reminds me of what many new graduates are experiencing – a wack job market. The outlook is super bleak for college graduates and many are now living at home with their parents. As you may assume, the job market for people who didn’t graduate from college is markedly worse.

For many, and like me six years ago, this type of news is simply frustrating. You bust your butt for four to five years, accumulate loads of debt in the hope of bettering your life, and then, nothing.

If you find yourself in this position, here are a few recommendations to get through this patch and thrive when you come out of it.

1. Do What You Got To Do
Here’s the deal. Unless you have a trust fund or substantial savings, you may have to take a short-term job that you don’t necessarily love. Why? To pay the bills and get by until the job you do want arrives. During rough patches early in my career, I worked temp jobs, retail, catering gigs, bartending gigs and more. What I didn’t do was take a staff job that was “good enough.” Those are the jobs you can get stuck in and before you know it 2 years have passed and you realize you’re not doing what you want to do. In the interim, do what you got to do. (Learn how a ‘A Walk-On Mentality‘ Can Help You Stand Out)

2. Get Focused
During this down time without a job is a great time to get focused and really identify exactly what type of career that you want to pursue. This also includes defining your goals and vision for the life you want to lead starting now. This is also a good time to identify what you don’t want. (VIDEO: Jenny Blake & I discuss finding your passion)

3. Networking 101
Like OutKast rhymed, “You got to get up/get out and do something/don’t let the days of your life pass you by.” Do all you can to network, meet new people, conduct informational interviews and get your face out there. The key is not to seem desperate. People can smell desperation from a mile away. It’s all about exposure and creating value. Also, make sure your personal brand is in order with your website, resume and more. (The Power of The Informational Meeting)

4. Work for Free
If paid work is hard to come by, one thing that isn’t is volunteer work.  I can’t tell you how many projects I’ve worked on for free and the payoff has been pretty awesome. These gigs led to paid gigs and the expanding of my network and influence. Plus, it helps to add current projects to your resume. For those of you with a solid professional background, check out pro bono opportunities with Catchafire. Craving meaningful work? Check out ReWork.

5. Team of Supporters
When you’re not working it can be tough. So, it’s important to have a good supporting cast around you. This is your team that support you and vice versa. If you find yourself down, reach out for encouragement and return the favor. A solid team will get you though a rough patch and by the way, they’re also good when the sun is shining. (Build your personal Board of Directors)

So stay optimistic, stay focused and most importantly, be proactive. Lastly, do your best to have enjoy yourself during your job search. When you do land that job and are working like crazy, you’ll wish you enjoyed this downtime more.

Antonio Neves is a career coach, speaker and award-winning business journalist. He is the founder of THINQACTION where he coaches exceptional young professionals. Follow Antonio.

Since 2009, Thomas has helped people find relationships and more fulfilling lives through lifestyle strategy. He’s so good at what he does that outlets like the Wall Street Journal, CNN and Cosmopolitan have compared him to the romantic comedy character Will Smith portrayed in the 2005 film,  “Hitch.”

Long story short, Thomas is a top notch professional and has an awesome track record of getting results for clients. Recently we talked in-depth about relationship building and how to properly expand your network. Enjoy.

Antonio Neves: Whether you’re trying to find the love of your life, a business partner or just network, what are some of the most blatant things people do wrong with relationship building? 

Thomas Edwards: The most blatant thing I’ve seen has been having a poor mentality going into a potential interaction.

Whether looking for love, business or a social connection, it’s important to have a positive mindset and provide value through your overall presentation.

If you focus more on having a positive and fun impact on the person you’re speaking with instead of getting them to like you, you’ll be likely to have better interactions.

We’ve all found ourselves at networking events which can be awkward. When we meet a stranger for the first time, what are some ways to naturally approach and start a conversation? 

With any approach, it’s best to follow my rule of 3 C’s.

The 3 C’s are context, confidence and content; and the rule is if you nail the first two, the third doesn’t really matter.

Context: The great thing about networking events is there is one common denominator amongst everyone there: they’re looking to meet people to make potential connections.

Confidence: Just like any other situation, if you present yourself confidently, people will respond positively. Although confidence is a state of mind, you can still do things physically that may trigger that emotional state, such as standing upright, correcting your posture, keeping your hands out of your pocket, making eye contact and most importantly, smiling.

Content: In most situations, walking up and saying something like, “Hey guys, I just wanted to introduce myself. My name is [enter name here],” will work just fine. Because you may be interrupting a conversation, you’ll want to redirect the attention off of you and back to them. A simple way to do this is by asking, “how do you guys know each other?”

You might be wondering why not ask them what they do for a living. Well, we all know that question is coming but it’s not necessary to ask so early. Shifting focus to building simple rapport through a social context will enable you stand out from other people and make it easier to connect with them professionally because you’re showing other dimensions of who you are.

Many of my clients find themselves at client dinners sometimes being the most junior person at the table. So they feel out of place. What’s your opinion on how they contribute to the conversation and add value? 

When I went to events early on, I typically went by myself, which for many can be nerve-wrecking. For me, I focused on one simple idea. “E & O,” or energy and optimism.

Being enthusiastic about life, what you’re doing and where you’re going can be very attractive to those around you. Combining that with having a “half glass full” mentality, and you have a great foundation for adding value.

The last part is the most important thing you can ever have — passion. Ever hear the phrase, “passion is sexy?” In the business world, that phrase couldn’t hold any truer. When you are sharing your passion with others, it’s an infections quality people surrounding you will be drawn to on a consistent basis.

How do you approach strategy with relationship building? Of course, if someone attends a conference they can just hand out a business card to everyone they meet. Is it better to be focused and strategic about your networking? 

When I started my business and got my cards for the first time, I was so excited to hand it out to everyone. After a while, you realize that your cards represent something more that just a marketing tool. It’s the ultimate business tool. Today, I only hand out my card to people I want to keep in touch or do business with.

Changing that mentality made me focus more on what’s really important in making business connections.

I treat my cards like hundred-dollar bills.

I want to make sure when I give one away, I’m indicating to that person I’m looking for make an investment in the relationship and hoping there will be a return on it.

What are some simple things people can do right now to expand and create value within their network?

Staying on the idea of adding value, there are multiple things you can do right away.

The first thing is to find out what the person you’re talking to is looking for.

If you can’t provide it yourself but know someone in the room that has what they’re looking for, immediately make an intro. If they aren’t in the room but you still know someone, be sure to make an email intro as soon as you can.

The follow up rule is the same rule I implement with my clients when meeting someone they’re romantically interested in: contact them the next day. If not making an introduction, let them know you enjoyed meeting with them and do one of two things:

1. Invite them to an event you’re going to. If they go, you’re no longer by yourself and now have an ally who will be looking to help you find a connection, essentially doubling your networking capacity for the event.
2. Send them a link to an event or site that can get them closer to finding what they are looking for.

My friends call this concept “paying it forward.” We believe the more you willingly give, the more you’ll get back in return. It may not be directly from the person you pay it forward to, but your good charity will never go unacknowledged, allowing you to extend your value and grow your network across all facets.

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Antonio Neves is a career coach, speaker and award-winning journalist. He is the founder of THINQACTION where he coaches exceptional young professionals. Via his blog posts, videos and workshops, his goal is to empower young professionals to transform potential into performance in their life and career.