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Once the town clerk’s office received Barboza’s payment for the ticket and saw the words, “F**K YOUR SH*TTY TOWN, B*TCHES,” he was reportedly a marked man.

Barboza, a Connecticut resident who lives two hours away from Liberty, was ordered to make the trek back in order to face a judge. When he arrived at the town’s courthouse to attend his hearing, a judge reportedly let him have it by berating him before the courtroom for his obscene choice of words on the summons.

After Barboza was cuffed, he posted the bail on the same day.  The charges against the young man were dismissed six months down the line by another judge who deemed that even though Barboza’s words were “crude, vulgar, inappropriate, and clearly intended to annoy,” they were fully protected by the First Amendment.

Now the New York Civil Liberties Union has filed a federal civil rights lawsuit on Barboza’s behalf, and according to Mariko Hirose, a staff attorney for the civil rights organization, who spoke with the Gothamist, “New York’s aggravated harassment statute must be struck from the books, once and for all. No one else should have to suffer the way Mr. Barboza did.

“Indeed in 2003, the New York Court of Appeals said the statute cannot be applied to speech just because it is “crude and offensive.” And in 1997, a federal court judge found the law to be “utterly repugnant to the First Amendment of the United States Constitution and also unconstitutional for vagueness.”

Meanwhile, Barboza is baffled as to why his written expression of disgruntlement with “the system” was taken to such extreme levels of punishment, “All I did was express my frustration with a ticket, and I almost ended up in jail. I want to make sure nobody else ends up in a similar situation because of this law,” contends Barboza.

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The 44-year-old truck driver’s penile woes date back to 2009, after receiving a three-part penile implant from Wilmington, Del., urologist Dr. Thomas J. Desperito. After undergoing the procedure, Metzgar’s scrotum reportedly resembled a volleyball in size, which he reportedly thought was just a normal consequence of the surgery.

When Metzgar did finally speak with his physician about the abnormality he was experiencing, which had progressed into an infection, the doctor suggested removing the prosthesis. According to the physician’s defense attorney, Michael C. Heyden (pictured far right), Metzgar unfortunately waited an inordinate amount of time before he made the decision to comply with his doctor’s recommendation.

Metzgar contends that he waited because he lost his insurance and could not afford the procedure at the time.

Metzgar finally had the device, which consisted of inflatable cylinders inside the shaft of his penis, a fluid reservoir under the abdominal wall, and a pump inside the scrotum, removed in August 2010, after it punctured his scrotum during a family trip to Niagara Falls.

The reason why Metzgar opted for the inflatable penile prosthetic in the first place was because he was a longtime diabetic who developed erectile dysfunction.

Metzgar attempted to have other courses of treatment to correct the condition but they all failed.

The constant erection took a toll on not only Metzgar but on his family as well, his attorney contends.   “I could hardly dance with an erection poking my partner,” Metzgar told jurors Monday when he took the witness stand.

Metzgar also started to dress differently, resorting to wearing baggy sweat pants and long shirts to hide his erection. “It’s not something you want to bring out at parties and show to friends,” said Metzgar, who wrapped up his testimony Tuesday.

Watch news coverage of Metzgar’s unfortunate situation here:

After his traumatic ordeal, a replacement prosthesis was the only alternative left for Metzgar, who got the procedure done from another physician. And while the prosthesis performs its job, the surgery reportedly left Metzgar with a penis that is 50 percent smaller. It also reportedly has and less sensation.

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The naked BART gymnast has been identified as Yeiner Garaizabalo, 24. He goes by the name of Yeiner Perez, a former circus acrobat who is believed to have suffered a nervous breakdown.

According to Slim Chance, a friend of Perez’s who leads the Berkeley circus troupe ClownSnotBombs, he had been going through tough times and stopped showing up to practice in May.

“He’s been through a lot of stress — he seems to have been having a breakdown,” said Slim Chance. “That seems to be the tip of it right there. I just can’t tell you anything more because I don’t really know what his state is. It’s not at all like his normal character.”

Chance described Perez as a “workaholic acrobat,” who was not known to do drugs.

“We’re thinking he may have even had a stroke sometime last year,” he said. “We’ve been trying to piece it together ourselves.”

According to SFGate.com, Perez was placed on an “emergency psychiatric hold following a psychiatric evaluation at California Pacific Medical Center, but was ultimately released.”

Perez was subsequently booked on suspicion of misdemeanor battery but was released within 48 hours because the district attorney was deciding whether or not to press charges, according to office spokeswoman Stephanie Ong Stillman said.

PHOTO CREDIT: Yeiner Perez/ Facebook.com

—————————————————————————————————————

Video of a naked — and aroused man, according to witnesses — attacking Bay Area Rapid Transit (BART) passengers and performing gymnastics on May 10 hit YouTube on Monday and the internet may never recover.

Mission Mission, a website covering San Francisco news broke the story, and their Facebook followers describe it in harrowing detail:

According to Jonah Wajchman:

I was busking in the station at the time, and saw the whole thing unfold. I first spotted him standing at the top of the escalator, on the narrow concrete strip that runs along the left side of the handrail. He was making strange noises and wild arm gestures, and then he began prancing down the strip like he was walking a tightrope. At that point he still had his underwear on, and a station agent who was standing nearby yelled for him to stop. When he reached the bottom, he got completely naked, throwing his underwear to the side of the escalator.

Once he was down in the station, he hopped on top of the nearest garbage can and began bouncing up and down while continuing to make weird noises. The station agent was watching him closely, but at the time it wasn’t clear that he was going to turn sinister – it seemed like he could easily jump off and run back up into the world. I’ve never witnessed anything as crazy go down in a station before, but momentary bizarre outbursts do occur, and they often end quickly, with the culprit leaving promptly.

Unfortunately, as you know, that was not the case here. A woman entering the station walked by the garbage can, and he catcalled at her. When she ignored him, he spit at her. At this point I called the police, and they said they were already on their way. Then a wave of people exited the gates, and he jumped down right in front of a woman, and started grabbing her as she screamed and moved backwards to avoid him; the station agent was trying to wrestle him away from her, and in the confusion she fell, and he hit the station agent and wrestled himself free.

Next, he leapt onto the gates, and not only did the splits, but also a headstand. Then he went into the paid area, and out of my sight. Someone told me they saw him do a full backflip and land on his feet. Another person, who was entering the station, told me that the rampage began above ground, where Naked Man began shedding his clothes, running around screaming, and jumping on top of cars.

While witnessing it, it was also my guess that he was on PCP – he had super strength, appeared impervious to pain, and was quite sweaty, making it hard to get a hold on him.

But follower Bianca Starr said the account was scary, not amusing:

Wasn’t that “amusing” as you are depicting it. Just saying. Just left 16 and Mission Bart station and as I was approaching the ticket exit, a completely naked man with his penis hard was backing a woman coming from work I assume against a wall and he threw her down to the ground. Someone tried to stop him and he ended up throwing the guy to the ground and then got on the ticket exit/entrance thing and squatted over for everyone to see his anus and then and then and then….. the point is that no one could control the situation and then he started going after an older man and had him by the neck. He was obviously on PCP since he was so strong and out of it ( i think???)) wtf! Everyone ran out and no one could help. I heard “the police were on the ir way” but we all ended up getting out of there. I didn’t stick around. Thank god my kids weren’t with me. Sad world and fucked up people. F**k 16th/Mission Bart. At your own risk!

Watch video below [Trigger: Nudity, violence, naked gymnastics]

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A lawyer from Brooklyn, N.Y., was arrested after she allegedly skipped out on paying a $6 cab fare and throwing her panties at police officers, the New York Post reports.

The New York Police Department says that 39-year-old Stephanie Hendricks was very drunk when they found her in front of a deli in the Brooklyn neighborhood of Williamsburg around 2:30 a.m. Saturday. When the cops confronted Hendricks, she allegedly and yelled, “Suck my p—y,’’ and, “Eat my ass, you f–king pigs!”

The deli owner said he was shocked by the woman’s actions.

“Normally we don’t see people cursing a police officer,” deli owner Mohammad Rahman, 54, told The Post. “But then she opened her clothes in front of the police officer, in front of us. She looked crazy.”

“She . . . showed everything to the cop . . . She had no panties.

“The cops were saying, ‘Calm down, lady. Calm down. Be cool,’ ” Rahman said.

The whole embarrassing incident was caught on the deli’s surveillance video, which shows Hendricks charging out of the shop, her butt exposed, and lunging at officers. Of course, the cops took her down to the ground. Hendricks was arrested and charged with theft of services, resisting arrest, disorderly conduct and exposure and other charges.

When The Post caught up with Hendricks, she admitted to her lewd behavior.

“My boyfriend broke up with me,” an embarrassed Hendricks explained yesterday to The Post. “I went out. I got drunk. I had a bad night.

“It was obviously an altercation, but I have no recollection from a certain point in the evening.

“Everyone was in a festive mood,” she said. “Things were flowing. Then things got out of control. I was wasted — all caps bold. You couldn’t get bigger, all caps bold, wasted.”

Here is more from The Post:

She said she regrets her behavior and tried to apologize to police yesterday.

She worries that her sloppy antics will sink her career.

“I’m a sole practitioner,” Hendricks said, sobbing. “I solicit business from the public.”

Two of her clients were befuddled by the wacky incident.

“Wow, that’s an absolutely bizarre story to hear,” one said, while another added, “I’m completely shocked and appalled to hear this because that doesn’t sound like her in the least.”

The client described Hendricks as a hardworking professional whom she has recommended to many business colleagues.

According to Hendricks’ Web site, she has given legal talks at several New York State Bar Association conferences and served on their committees.

As bad as her behavior was, Hendricks believes she will be able to move beyond the embarrassing episode.

“Everybody has something like this happened to them,” the lawyer reasoned, “Life will go on. I will survive.”

Jon-Christopher Sowells (pictured) took a test drive that he’ll never forget!

The Gwinnett County, Ga., man went shopping for a BMW and decided to take the car for a test drive. What happened next was disturbing. The cops pulled him over and cuffed him for obstruction, according to the GA Daily News.

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It all started when Sowells drove a BMW out of Philips Motors in Snellville for a test run. He drove onto a highway and was stopped by police officers soon after. According to Sowells, the officer said he didn’t have any tags on the car.

“I said, ‘No problem.’ I don’t have any tags on this car because it’s not my car,” Sowells said he told one of the officers. “The dealer is right there. We can get it all clarified.”

When Sowells asked the officers repeatedly to call and confirm his test drive with the dealership, they allegedly refused. Sowells said the officers asked to view a document that was strewn across the vehicle’s back seat. Not knowing what it was, he refused.

Bad move!

The officers then resorted to using bully tactics, Sowells claims. “They asked me to get out of the car. I said ‘I don’t feel comfortable.’ They commenced to open up the car door and they tried to drag me out of the door by my left arm,” he contends.

It was at this point that the officers called for backup.

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The police report states that Sowells tried pulling away from the policemen. When the lawmen pulled out their tasers, Sowells then acquiesced and was arrested on the spot.

Sowells is upset by the incident because, “they’re treating me like I’m a criminal and I hadn’t done anything.”

Here’s what the Snellville police department had to say about the matter:

The officer observed a paper on the rear seat that appeared to be of the type dealers use when placing a vehicle for sale. He asked if he could retrieve it and Mr. Sowells refused. Based on his refusal to provide information and his passive and then active resistance, Mr. Sowells was charged with obstruction.

Police officials also state that when the dealership was contacted, no one answered the call. When Sowells and the officer drove to the dealership, “The dealer comes out to pick the car up and at this point I’m thinking we can all go home,” Sowells figured. “Everything is OK now. No, it’s not OK. I’m going to jail.”

But he is not taking the ruffian treatment that he claims to have endured by the officers lightly. The Georgia resident, who has never been arrested, plans on fighting his case to the hilt.

BTW, Sowells ended up purchasing the BMW after all!

When Mark Eschoe reportedly took his 8-year-old disabled daughter, Marlee (pictured), to a Chuck E. Cheese birthday party in Cobb County, Ga., and tried to take her to the women’s bathroom, he was allegedly not allowed to. Now the miffed Father is angry and wants to make sure this occurrence does not happen to another parent with a special needs child, reports WSBTV.

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Eschoe and his daughter reportedly attended the party on May 18th, not long after his daughter had been released from the hospital. Marlee had suffered two strokes, which were caused by brain aneurysms, within a six month period. The doting Dad told WSBTV reporters that he and Marlee were at Chuck E. Cheese about 20 minutes when she had to use the restroom.

Since Marlee needs assistance when using the restroom, Eschoe accompanied her. When a waitress witnessed Eschoe walking away from the men’s room, she informed him that the women’s bathroom was all clear.

Eschoe attempted to take Marlee to the women’s restroom, but he was reportedly stopped by the establishment’s manager. 

According to Eschoe, the manager seemed irate, telling him, “No, you know what? I’m done. I’m not going to inconvenience my patrons. I don’t care if she’s special needs. I’m not going to treat her any differently.”

Watch news coverage of this incident here:

Eschoe and his wife, Kiyome, who was not present at the party, now say that the manager’s move to bar their daughter from using the public restroom facility violates the Americans With Disabilities Act since they were unable to provide an alternative solution.

Yet, an unidentified corporate spokesperson from the Chuck E. Cheese organization refutes what the Eschoes are claiming and contends that the women’s restroom was indeed occupied and employees were in fact working on an alternative solution to the situation.

Meanwhile, the Eschoes are standing their ground regarding the matter, with Kiyome lamenting, “I definitely don’t want any parent to go through what we went through.”

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Mourners were aghast when they witnessed Brighton Dama Zanthe, who passed away after a long term illness at age 34, twitching in his coffin during his funeral in Zimbabwe last week. Many at the funeral ran for their lives, fearing that the young man had come back to haunt them, reports the New Zimbabwe.

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As the young man moved around, many of his friends and family who had come to pay their respects stumbled over one another as they hightailed out of the funeral service.

Lot Gaka, who had been a friend and employer of the deceased, managed to keep his wits about him and sprung into action. He approached the coffin, snatched off the blanket and called an ambulance. After spending two days in intensive care, Zanthe was discharged from the hospital.

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“I don’t know what happened, and I only remember being on a life support system in hospital,” the New Zimbabwe reports him as saying.

People are still incredulous of the fact that Zanthe had resurrected after being ill for so long. As a matter of fact, Gaka actually expected to receive a call from Zanthe’s wife with news that he had passed away.

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“Zanthe had been on sick leave for some time and everyone at work was aware that he was critical,” Gaka told the New Zimbabwe. “We would visit him at his home in Mkoba 14. I was not surprised when I received a call from Zanthe’s wife on Monday night of last week saying that her husband had died.”

Before Zanthe woke up from a sleep that all thought was permanent, his body had been placed in a coffin. A body viewing procession followed which ended with the deceased being transported to a mortuary. According to Gaka, it was during the viewing that the twitching was spotted.

Zanthe says people are still stunned by all that took place at his funeral. But he goes on to say, “Everything is history to me. What I can only confirm is that people gathered at my house to mourn, but I was given another chance and I am alive.  I feel okay now.”

Chad “Ochocinco’ Johnson

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The warrant which comes from the Broward County, Florida Sheriff’s Office, contends that Johnson failed to meet with his probation officers on February 15 and March 15.  The former wide receiver also allegedly never bothered to show proof of enrollment and completion of a court mandated ‘Batterers Intervention Program.’

Johnson was arrested last August and charged with domestic battery after he and his bride, Lozada, got into a nasty argument that resulted in him allegedly head-butting her.  The violence resulted in Lozada, who is known for her starring role on the hit reality show, “Basketball Wives,” having to go to the hospital to receive stitches on her forehead for an open wound.

After the incident involving Lozada, Johnson was cuffed and charged with domestic battery.  He pleaded no contest, was placed on probation for a year and his 41-day old union not-so-wedded bliss unraveled at the seams.  Lozada filed for divorce and the entire saga was played out publicly until the filing was finalized last September.

Since his marriage woes, the former “Dancing With the Stars” golden boy has been plagued by other negative life-altering occurrences.  After playing in the NFL on various teams for 11 years, the Miami Dolphins dropped Johnson after his domestic abuse charges went public.  Johnson also lost pricey endorsements, has suffered through money problems — such as losing property through foreclosure — and has been deemed a ‘deadbeat dad’ by one of his baby mammas.

For now, Johnson, who lives in Pasadena, California, will be taken into custody. If a hearing determines that he violated probation, it could mean jail time.

Oh woe is Ocho…again!

A Florida woman was arrested last week after she allegedly stabbed her live-in boyfriend for farting in her face, The Smoking Gun reports.

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Deborah Ann Burns, 37, told the cops that she was watching TV that night in her Immokalee home she shares with her boyfriend when he passed gas in her face. When she approached Willie Butler about it, he allegedly became agitated and told her to “shut up.”

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During the altercation Burns allegedly grabbed an eight-inch kitchen knife and threw it at Butler. The blade struck him in the stomach. Bulter suffered a minor laceration for which he was treated at the scene by EMS personnel.

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Burns was arrested for aggravated battery with a deadly weapon and booked into the county jail, where she is being held in lieu of $50,000 bond on the felony count. This is not her first felony charge, however.

A convicted felon, Burns, spent 21 months in state prison for aggravated assault with a weapon and battery on a law enforcement officer.

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Masturbate-A-Thon is a yearly event that began back in 1995, where participants raise money for charity and increase public awareness to get rid of the stigma of shame attached to this form of self-love and to encourage self-pleasure as a safer and healthier form of sexual expression. Over the last few years, Masturbate-A-Thon has raised thousands of dollars for countless organizations that have benefited causes such as HIV/AIDS awareness and women’s health initiatives.

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The event’s organizers claim that masturbation is something of a cure-all! Masturbation, organizers claim, relieves stress, increases stamina, helps to secrete endorphins (feelings of well-being) in the body, improves cardiovascular health, cures insomnia and menstrual cramps, decreases bouts of prostatitis in men, helps combat depression and anxiety, decreases candidiasis in women (yeast infections), improves pelvic muscle strength in women and overall sexual relations.

The monies given by sponsors of the event is based on duration–basically, the length of time for which a participant masturbates

The Masturbate-A-Thon is monitored by officials who verify that all of the methods used are within the event’s guidelines and ensure that there is no cheating involved.

Thus far, the world record holder of the “Longest Time Spent Masturbating” is Todd Campbell of South Wales, U.K., whose 2009 record of masturbating for 9 hours and 58 minutes has yet to be beaten.

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(His alleged co-conspirators surround him in the photo to the right)

The 81-year-old was the ring leader of a group that resold pills provided by co-conspirators who were prescribed the drugs, according to police. They allege that Cox sold $1000 worth of Dilaudid during a six-month investigation that included undercover cops.

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His 26-year-old grandson, Erick Blakey, was also arrested in the sting.

“Listen, son, all this is a big bunch of crap,” Cox said in a TSG interview. He acknowledged having obtained Dilaudid for his grandson, but does not recall reselling the painkiller to anyone else.

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“I’m 81-years-old. I’ve never been in trouble before in my life.”

That’s not true. He was arrested in 1983 in Orlando for lewd and lascivious behavior.

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When The Smoking Gun asked Cox about the arrest, he said an undercover officer accused him of “shaking my d*ck at him.” He copped to a lesser offense and ended up serving six months probation.

Cox was released after his daughter posted $5,000 bond. He is scheduled to appear at Circuit Court for arraignment on June 11.

“I’m very sorry for whatever I’ve done,” he said of his drug arrest.

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Police say 53-year-old Ophelia Neal faces bank robbery and explosives charges in Saturday’s robbery at a Fifth Third Bank branch on Harper Ave. near 15 Mile Road.

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Police are hunting for the parole absconder. The Michigan Department of Corrections say Neal is black, 5-foot-7 and has partially gray hair.

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The state says she has fraud, assault and marijuana convictions.

Police say the robber told bank employees she had a bomb in her cloth bag and demanded money. They say she took an undisclosed amount of money and escaped in a car with a man at the wheel.

What’s the latest craze that takes the cake as far as bizarre palate pleasers? Cocktails made with semen. In his new book, “Semenology:  The Semen’s Bartender Handbook,” Paul Photenhauer discusses the benefits of adding semen to enhance beverages, reports the Washington Post’s Slate.

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Photenhauer, a semen connoisseur of sorts, describes his “new” addition as “the ultimate handbook for mixologists looking for ingredients that go beyond exotic fruit juices and rare spirits.” The book provides ways in which you can store semen and recipes on some real tasty zingers like Macho Mojito, the Slightly Saltier Caviar, and the Galliano Cum Shot. No, really.

But why does Photenhauer dabble in the mixology of semen?

The author explains that semen has a uniqueness about it that seems to enhance a recipe or drink.  “For me, it’s more of a fun twist to add to food, or in this case a drink. It adds a definite personal twist to it,” Photenhauer told SF Weekly.  “People eat all kinds of weird stuff,” Photenhauer contends. “Eggs are the menstruation of chickens. Milk is the mammary excretion from cows. Semen is…at least it’s fresh and you know who the producer is.”

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Photenhauer does not want folks to get it twisted, he is not a perv who goes around drinking semen by the bucket-load from strangers!  He told Roth, “I would never eat or drink semen, cooked or otherwise, from someone I wouldn’t be willing to have sex with.”

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Photo Credit: Orlando Sentinel

Florida man Felix Lockett (pictured), 34, was hospitalized with “serious” injuries Wednesday afternoon after a single-car crash that left him literally dancing in the street, reports the Orlando Sentinel.

Law-enforcement officers and rescuers arrived on the scene to find Lockett “stripped naked and dancing around in the street,” said Fire Rescue spokesman John Mulhall.

Responders began to experience watery eyes and respiratory distress after opening the vehicle’s door. When a hazard team arrived, a bottle containing formaldehyde was discovered. Lockett allegedly confessed to authorities that he had mixed the formaldehyde — commonly used in embalming fluid — with the marijuana.

“The man, he was naked. Nothing on, I mean nothing,” witness Trudy Lane told CF News 13. “He had the music in the car playing real loud and he was whamming, whamming on the car, like he was beating to the sound of the music.”

Read more from the Orlando Sentinel:

According to Fire Rescue spokesman John Mulhall, rescuers were called to Via Hacienda Circle near Honour Road in Orange County just before 8 a.m., after a vehicle crashed into a wall.

An FHP trooper, who was attempting to investigate the crash, opened the car’s door and almost immediately reported symptoms including watery eyes and trouble breathing, Mulhall said.

The trooper and two nearby Orange County sheriff’s deputies who also experienced symptoms of exposure were taken to Orlando Regional Medical Center for treatment, according to Fire Rescue.

Lockett faces charges of driving under the influence.

“Formaldehyde, if you’ve ever smelled it from your high school biology class whatever, it’s a potent chemical,” said Mulhall. “So in a close space like a car, that original trooper did get a pretty strong dose of it.”

The 18-year-old was cuffed by police and charged with disorderly conduct after he yelled bingo in a crowded hall in Covington, Ky., that was filled with elderly people who did not take too kindly to his prank, reports MSN.

The arresting officer, Police Sgt. Richard Webster, says elderly adults tend to take the game of bingo “very seriously” and when someone yells that they’ve won and didn’t, it can create quite a raucous.

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Webster told the Cinncinati Enquirer, “When they realized it wasn’t a real bingo, they started hooting and hollering and yelling and cussing.” When the youth was told to apologize to the crowd and he refused, Webster took him into custody.

The incident involving Whaley, which occurred last month, left the youth with a little trepidation with regards to the hearing or even saying the word, “bingo!” Whaley could have faced 90 days in jail and a $250 fine for his offense, but a judge was lenient and instead ordered him to stay far away from the bingo hall. He also forbade Whaley from saying the word “bingo” for six months–an order the young man is not taking seriously.

“I tried to say it backward, like ‘o-bing,’ or something along the lines of that,” Whaley jokingly told NBC. “Kids out there – don’t say bingo in the bingo hall!”

Following the wishes of his dead namesake, 8-year-old Sanele Masilela (pictured left) got hitched to Helen Shabangu (pictured), who is a Mother of five, in their village of Tshwane, South Africa, reports the U.K. Daily Mail.

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The wedding announcement sent shock waves throughout the town, but according to the boy’s parents, the child was merely respecting the wishes of his dead grandfather. Masilela, who is named after his grandfather, supposedly told by the elder to have a white lavish wedding, because he never had one before he died.

Fearing that there would be some sort of doom brought upon him if he did not follow through with his grandfather’s wishes, the boy agreed to marry the woman he loved, Shabangu.

The lavish ceremony took two months to plan and cost around $2,000, which is an exorbitant amount in the little village. Shabangu wore a frilly white wedding gown and Masilela sported a shimmery silver tux.  The event was attended by some 100 people, with the pair exchanging vows, rings, and a kiss after they were pronounced husband and wife.

Even though the couple went through the elaborate ceremony, Shabangu — as well as the Masilela’s parents — insist that the wedding was just a ritual.

“I’m married and have five kids of my own, but I know that this is what the ancestors wanted – and now they are happy. It is a ritual. We are just playing now, but it is a sign that he will get married one day,” Shabangu, who is already married to her husband of 30 years, 65-year-old Alfred, and has children ranging in age from 27 to 37, added.

Consequently, the pair did not sign a marriage certificate and have reportedly gone back to their previous lives.

Meanwhile, Masilela has some plans of his own, the boy emphatically told the Daily Mail, “I’m happy that I married Helen – but I will go to school and study hard.  When I’m older, I will marry a lady my own age.”

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The 40-plus year old woman felt compelled to do something about her extraordinarily weak vaginal muscles after she given birth to her child.  So Tatyana reportedly began researching how she could strengthen her sagging intimate muscles and stumbled upon some ancient Dao teachings.  She read how women used wooden balls to deal with the feminine problem she had encountered.  She told The Sun, “I looked around, saw a Murano glass ball and inserted it into my vagina. It took me ages to get it out!”

Over the last twenty years, Tatyana, who says she was born with a normal female anatomy, has managed to increase the strength of her vaginal walls via vigorous lifting.  How she accomplished this weightlifting feat is by inserting a condom-covered wooden egg-shaped device (pictured) with dangling cords and inserting it into her vagina.   Various weights can be fitted to the cords and the egg is held in place as Tatyana tightens her vaginal muscles.

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Tatyana will be featured on a UK TV show, “The Body Shocking,” later this month where she will displaying her stupefying talent  She also has a website where she offers to train people about the art of Intimate Gymnastics.

Ouch!

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Clifford Smith (pictured) is facing charges of simple assault and vandalism after he reportedly choked a wheelchair-bound woman for eating the last piece of chicken at a dinner gathering, reports WAFB 9.

SEE ALSO: Woman Caught With Loaded Gun In Her Vagina

According to a police report, Smith, 44, and some other people sat down for dinner on Sunday evening. When there was only one piece of chicken left, an unidentified woman, who is physically disabled, reached for the piece and began eating it.

Smith had his eye on the last piece of chicken and became enraged when he saw the woman grabbing for it. Smith then yelled that he had wanted the chicken and allegedly lost control of his emotions at the dinner table.

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Investigators state that Smith first struck the woman. He then picked up a beer bottle and smashed it against a wall. Diners couldn’t believe what they were witnessing. The Pacolet, S. C., man then took his hands, placed them around the woman’s neck and proceeded to choke her as she defenselessly sat in her wheelchair.

As the victim scrambled to dial 911 with her cell phone, Smith reportedly snatched it from her and smashed it into pieces.

Police were summoned by witnesses and Smith was placed under arrest.

A 28-year-old Oklahoma woman was caught with drugs and a firearm in all of the wrong places.

The Smoking Gun reports that Christie Dawn Harris was arrested on Monday, after Ada police officers spotted her and another woman, Jennifer Delancy, inside of a vehicle outside of a closed restaurant. Cops noticed that “both seats were laid all the way back.” When Delancy and Harris were asked if any weapons or drugs were inside of the vehicle, Harris said “she did not think there was anything.”

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Though when a police dog began sniffing around, it immediately suspected there were drugs and weapons inside of the Toyota Yaris. After cops searched the vehicle, hey retrieved meth, drug paraphernalia, a pistol, and a loaded magazine. Harris and Delancy were then arrested.

During the ride to jail, Harris “stated several times that she needed to go to the bathroom.”

At lockup, Harris was asked to change into jail clothing. Before going to the bathroom, an officer asked her to lower her underwear for a contraband check. Harris told the officer that she was on her period and could not comply; she eventually lowered her underwear.

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But the cop did not find contrabandhe found a loaded Freedom Arms .22-caliber handgun, which was loaded with three live rounds and one spent shell. “I observed at that time a wooden and metal item sticking out from her vagina area,” reported Officer Kathy Unbewust, who added that she “pulled the item from her vagina, and found it to be a 5 shot revolver with rounds in the chamber.”

Guess she was caught “vag-handed.” (red-handed, vag-handed?)

The police reports states that the “gun (was) located in suspect(‘s) vagina.” The cops also discovered plastic baggies containing methamphetamine lodged in the crack of Harris’s buttocks.

Harris was scheduled to be arraigned this afternoon on felony weapons and narcotics charges.

Indeed, this young woman was “full” of trouble.

Upper Darby police say 27-year-old Delaina Garling went to the Family Dollar Store on Monday, a place she’d been banned from for alleged theft. When employees tried to escort her out, police say she doused them with pepper spray.

Police Superintendent Michael Chitwood says after employees tackled Garling, she handed the can to her daughter and said: “You know what to do, baby. Spray it!” Chitwood says the girl never used the spray.

Garling is charged with simple assault and other counts. A telephone message left for her was not immediately returned.

A man was arrested in Manatee County, Fla. this week for assaulting his wife after she asked him to stop scratching his testicles, The Smoking Gun reports.

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Ronald Howard, 30, was sitting on his couch scratching his man jewels, when his girlfriend, Shalamar Petrarca, insisted that he stop because it was disgusting and she was preparing to eat dinner. Howard did not take the demand very well, rising up and confronting Patrarca. He allegedly got in her face and asked that she not judge him.

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Petrarca says the verbal altercation got physical when Howard pushed her into the corner of their kitchen, forcing her to fall to the ground and scratch her leg. She says he then grabbed her and threw her out of their apartment. But Howard’s version of what went down is different.

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He says that Petrarca punched him in the eye for scratching his testicles. He admits to pushing her out of the door but only in self-defense. Howard said he did not want to call the police because he did not want the situation to escalate to that point. According to the police report, Howard had no visible injuries. But Petrarca did have a scratch on her leg that was consistent with her version of how the itchy episode went down.

Ronald was placed under arrest, charged with misdemeanor battery and booked into the Manatee County jail. Bail has not been set.

Aydrea Meaders was arrested after she allegedly stepped onto the stage of her son’s school assembly and began stripping before an audience of 200-plus students and school staff, News 10 ABC reports.

Scroll down for news story video

Albany police responded to a call from North Albany Academy in upstate New York for a report of a woman exposing herself inside of the school. When the cops arrived on the scene, staff informed them that Meaders, 24, stepped onto the stage and began dancing with the students. No one expected her to join the assembly, though her dancing was not seen as anything appropriate.

“It had been going as a terrific event. The cafeteria was full. We probably had about 200 students in there from throughout the school,” said Ron Lesko of the Albany School District.

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But it didn’t take long for things to unravel, as Meaders allegedly began dancing as if she were auditioning for the “Playas Club.”

“Suddenly she stepped to the front of the group threw off her coat and stripped from the waist up,” said Lesko.

Staff quickly rushed to the stage, escorted her to the side and shielded her away from students while they waited for the cops to arrive. Looking back on the incident, Lesko said Meaders was not acting unusual until she decided that she wanted to strip.

“No behavior that anyone encountered during the assembly and she spent the time talking to the principal having perfectly normal conversation.”

She was charged with seven counts of Endangering the Welfare of a Child and one count of Public Lewdness.

Pastor Jim Colerick (pictured) has put together a video he thinks will inspire youth who are seeking the “Christian truth.” The “inspirational message” this man of the cloth is sharing is called “Rapping for Jesus,” reports the Daily Mail. Though, the end of the first verse may make you cringe.

Here is the beginning of the song below:

“Well I wrote this song for the Christian youth

“I wanna teach kids the Christian truth.”

“If you wanna reach those kids on the street”

“Then you gotta do a rap, do a hip hop beat.”

“So heed my sermon, an urban kid”

My rhymes are fly, my beats are sick.”

My crew is big and it keeps getting bigger.”

“That’s cause Jesus Christ is my N*gga.

Yes, he said, “Jesus Christ is my N*gga.”

The controversial video, which was uploaded onto YouTube earlier this month by Brian Spinney, could have actually been produced some five years ago.  Spinney created his YouTube account on Jan. 15, the same day that Pastor Colerick’s church, West Dubuque 2nd Church of Christ’s website went live online. The website claims the church closed about nine years ago and Spinney, who reveals he was a high school student at the time, says he produced the video with Colerick and his wife.

Watch the video below

The video has been gaining popularity, especially via the social media site Reddit. Though it appears to be a parody with Colerick and his wife, Mary Sue, trying to mimic the moves of urban rappers. Many think the production is harmless. The papal pair with their Christian swag are just using the vehicle of rap to get the word out about Christ and critics should not label their intentions as ‘racist’ is the opinion that is being voiced by many on Reddit.

However, there are those who think such verses as “Jesus Christ is our Nig*a – let his light shine through ya” and “Let his love pop a cap in your butt and say, hallelujah,” are not only racist but blasphemous.

Where do you stand?

The faceless woman behind the botched butt implant YouTube video that went viral late last year went public for the first time on “Trisha Goddard,” a one-hour NBC daytime talk show.

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Renee, who did not want to give her last name, spoke on a segment titled “My extreme butt implants nearly killed me.” RadarOnline got previews of the show exclusively. She told Trisha how she first realized that something was amiss about her surgery. “I was showing my girlfriend how I could reach up under the implant and it just kind of flipped and freaked me out,” she said. “I started getting really sick, I couldn’t breath.”

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As NewsOne previously reported, Renee posted the video in November. She is shown in the 21-second clip flipping the implant and telling the camera, “I don’t think an implant’s supposed to do that. It shouldn’t be able to flip.”

See the video below:

A plastic surgeon told the New York Daily News the problem with the implants was that they were too large. “That implant appears to be among the largest available for implantation. It’s just huge,” he said. “It’s way too big for her body.”

“Most implants we use contain around 320 (cubic centimeters of silicone gel),” he said. “That woman appears to have 700 or 800 cc implants. That’s the size of a dinner plate,” he added.

During the show, Renee showed the audience the butt implants that she flipped around during the YouTube clip, causing a loud gasp in the studio. As for Renee, she had a message for anyone wanting to augment their appearance: “Love the skin you’re in. Please don’t go and do this stuff to yourself.  If more people would come out and tell their stories then less women would go and do this.”

Watch the preview clips below:

Caleb Grothberg of Portland, Ore., was arrested after allegedly choking his girlfriend with his dreadlocks, CBS affiliate KOIN 6-TV reports.

Portland police say that they responded to a domestic violence call at a residence on the 3200 block of Southeast 22nd Avenue  around 2:30 a.m. A woman told them that 32-year-old Grothberg had assaulted her and then choked her with his dreadlocks. Officers found and arrested the man, after searching the neighborhood.

He faces counts of second-degree kidnapping, second-degree attempted assault, fourth-degree assault, menacing and domestic violence.

Comparing a candidate’s political ideologies or even egos is one thing but sizing up…er…private parts is a horse of a different color!  The official Durex condoms feed on the Chinese version of Twitter, Sina Weibo, posted two images on Wednesday night that suggested in addition to having a greater number of electoral votes, that President Barack Obama is better endowed than his former Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney, reports Ad Age.

SEE ALSO: Obama Administration On How They Won: Supporters ‘Believed In Obama, Message’

The ad features two pictures, one of First Lady Michelle Obama (pictured left) smiling from ear-to-ear and holding her hands about 10-inches apart as if depicting a size measurement. The opposite photo is that of Romney’s wife, Ann (pictured right), looking quite disillusioned and holding her thumb and index fingers mere millimeters apart from one another as if also referencing size.

The caption in Chinese, translated in English reads,

The difference between Obama and Romney is…concluding by saying, that you make your own assumptions, who has got a bigger what.

Don’t expect us to finish that for you.

According to the microblog, the video was not meant to be shared globally, it was only meant for its Chinese viewers.

Sound off!

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Police say 52-year-old James Summers, wearing a tie and carrying a briefcase, claimed he was sent by Denny’s corporate office Tuesday to be the new manager at the restaurant in Madison. The current manager told him he must have the wrong restaurant. Summers told her she apparently had not received the memo about the change in leadership.

Authorities say the manager called her supervisors while Summers helped himself to a meal. WISC-TV ( http://bit.ly/wXDz2w ) says police were summoned and took Summers into custody. Officers say they found a stun gun on his belt. Summers is charged with disorderly conduct, drug possession and possessing an electric weapon.

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On January 10, the 33-year-old Williams arrived to babysit the baby girl at 8:00 a.m.  In just four hours, Williams reportedly called her husband, Christopher Peters, 16 times to ask him various questions, ranging from diaper changing to removing a car seat from a vehicle, about how to care for the child.

Peters reportedly began to notice that with every phone call, his wife began to sound more and more agitated with her child care duties.  The uneasiness and erratic tone of William’s voice tipped her husband off that he should pay her an on-the-job visit.  When he arrived, Williams insisted on giving him the child.

Afterward, Williams frantically ran to a neighbor’s apartment and tried to convince them that the infant was evil.  Williams explained that she had witnessed the infant’s eye color change to blue.  The neighbors, upon hearing Williams, were so concerned that they summoned the police. A neighbor told authorities:

[She] knocked on her door and said there was a baby in her apartment and she didn’t know how it got there.” The neighbor also said Williams called 4-week-old baby ‘evil.’

By the time police arrived, they discovered that a granular detergent with blue flecks was covering the infant’s face.  The child’s eyes were blood red and bulging and there were burn marks and blood pooling around her mouth.  Police found the detergent’s open container and the blue flecked substance matched what was found on the child’s face.

When questioned by police, Williams said that she saw a man standing by the infant’s crib.  When authorities asked her about the detergent, she defensively denied any wrongdoing.

Williams was arrested and charged with the assault of a child in the second degree and is being held in jail on a $100,000 bond.

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The child’s mom, Karla Noriega (pictured), said that her son, Santiago, received the gas-powered minibike as a Christmas present.  The kindergartner was out riding in his two-day-old bike when he crashed into the vehicle.  When police were called onto the scene, they gave the child several summonses for reckless driving, driving without a license, and not having his vehicle registered.  The fines totaled $183.

Noriega, who thought that her young son’s exorbitant fines were absurd, made the decision to go public.  The media picked up on the boy’s case and now police officials are stating that they regret their hasty ticketing.

Hector Arceluz, the city council secretary, told the AP that as of Thursday, the minibike was released to the family, the fines dismissed, and the officers who ticketed the child will be punished for their actions.

Meanwhile, although Gael is happy that his motorized toy has been returned to him, it went kaput after the car crash.

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A Sheriff’s office report states that on the morning of the home invasion, a male victim was struck over the head as he stepped outside his apartment. Rosario, Anthony Lusson, and a third unidentified attacker reportedly dragged the victim back inside his home and then yanked a woman’s hair before throwing her down to the floor. After allegedly choking the male victim, the captors ransacked the apartment, looking for valuables to confiscate while holding their victims at gunpoint, then fled.

Deputies managed to locate Rosario after scouring some leads, and when they entered his home, they found him hiding in a clothes dryer.  The assailant was charged with two counts of home invasion, robbery with a firearm, and one count of aggravated assault with a firearm. Suspect Lusson knew his victims and was cuffed shortly after the crime.  He faces a $150,000 bond.

The third suspect is still at large.

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