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fantasia

The recent suicide attempt by the singer Fantasia took the entire world by surprise, myself included. Nearly every time I’ve seen Fantasia on television, she’s exuded nothing less than positive, empowering energy. She makes music that most of us can relate to, and seems to have a place in her heart for those who are working to overcome their obstacles.

Her apparent drug overdose, for which she was hospitalized, came after Paula Cook accused her of having an affair with her husband Antwaun. Fantasia has also been plagued by reported financial troubles, a decline in her career and rumors that she and Antwaun might have documented their relationship with a sex tape. It seems that love can make us do some crazy things – all of us included.

I am not sure if Fantasia was deceived by Antwaun or not, but it’s not out of the question. Millions of married men and women tell their lovers one thing and their spouses another. But without making an assumption regarding whether or not Fantasia was at fault, I thought about how her suicide attempt might affect millions of her young fans across America, including my daughters.

First, every young person should remember the cliché that “Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.” I’ve personally hit the bottom of the abyss of love and found that it helped me bounce back to an even better place than I was before. I’ve been embarrassed, deceived, broke, and devastated, and in every single case, the problem was in my past within the next 2 – 6 months. When I look back on my teenage years and think about times that I thought about hurting myself, I thank God that I stuck it out until the pain was behind me.

Second, Fantasia’s suicide attempt reminds us that money and fame can’t buy happiness. Fantasia was once a girl with a dream, just one of hundreds of thousands of talented singers praying for the chance to become a star. Against all odds, she found herself on the largest stages in the world, living a life she never imagined. That life eventually led to financial tragedy, interpersonal complications and the suicide attempt we are reading about today. All this reminds us that being whole and happy on the inside is your ultimate key to true wealth and success. Money and fame can’t make you whole.

So, as you work to become successful at whatever you are trying to do, always keep in mind that your happiness is found on the inside. While it is tempting to think that more money in the bank, better looks or meeting the right person is going to make your life complete, the truth is that much of your psychological well-being is control by a person called “you.”
Dr. Boyce Watkins is the founder of the Your Black World Coalition and the author of the book, “Black American Money.” To have Dr. Boyce commentary delivered to your email, please click here.

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RELATED:

Fantasia Allegedly Overdoses

Fantasia’s Overdose Caused By Sleep Aids And Aspirin

Tags: American Idol, Black Celebrities, Fantasia
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  • http://www.blackplanet.com/odoggz/ odoggz

    What we should learn is that whatever she took, it’s not strong enough to do the job. Go harder next time!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/jayevans20/ jayevans20

    Odoggz, that’s a terrible thing to say. I was hoping that she took the stuff by mistake. Dude probably did lie to her but she may get punished for it in the end. Taking your life isn’t the answer. I pray that you find the guidance that I thought you had in the first place. Nonetheless, may the Lord bless her and guide her. We’re all human and make mistakes.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/Toni_Anthony/ Toni_Anthony

    NOT everybody has to learn what KARMA is! Any time you mess with a Married Individual, the storm to follow is WHAT a B**ch gets! How is a Predator going to flip into VICTIM mode when they’re S**t Back Fires on them? As far as Ms. F., Goes? And that Male Prostutite she got herself caught up with? Ms. F., wrote a book which turned into a TV Movie, now she has New Source material for Another Book/TV Movie on how NOT to be supid, gulliable and the aftermath(s) of finding out YOU’VE BEEN PLAYED! SOMETHING FROM nothing LEAVES NOTHING & A WHOLE LOT LEFT TO BE DESIRED!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/jenlonte/ jenlonte

    Odoggz, you need a spankin. You’re wrong for that one.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/msveevee1/ msveevee1

    @Odoggz…that was very inconsiderate and just heartless what you said you stupid bastard! Since you giving out tips, why don’t you go take your own advice and kill yourself! Since it sounds like you know how to get the job done, you low-life!

    Anyways…there are so many ppl that are not happy with themselves and think that hiding behind money and material things are going to make up for their empty insides. It’s so sad that ppl hate themselves while putting on this fake persona that they really do love themselves and that everything is alright with life. What is missing is a spiritual void. When your life is not right with Jehovah God, things can get really ugly real fast. This is what’s going on in the world. While ppl are too busy trying to sike themselves out in believing there is no God or no need for a God bcuz they think that they have everything under control and their destiny is in their hands when it’s not, Jehovah God does something in those ppl’s life to show them otherwise. Face it ppl, with out Jehovah in your life having your back, you are nothing. So trying to kill yourself seems logical at the time. Taking the easy way out of this messed up life.

    Well this is the wrong thing to do bcuz everyone has a purpose to fulfill in this lifetime whether you like it or not. It’s just up to you to find out what your purpose is. And I’mma tell you this now, it don’t have nothing to do with yourself like you would like it to be.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/Resheedah1/ Resheedah1

    I pray that Fantasia gets well & God will lead her path.
    Dr. Boyce I truly appreciate the article because it touches many young girls & women when a public figure endures hardship.
    As the article stated no matter how much money & fame one receives it doesn’t buy happiness.
    She is human & makes mistakes.
    We pay for them in some capacity but God doesn’t judge.
    Keep her & the Cook family in your prayers.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/SensuousSexy09/ SensuousSexy09

    WOW, AT THE WORLD BELIEVING THAT FANTASIA TRIED TO COMMIT SUICIDE. EVEN PROFESSIONALS ARE BELIEVING THE HOAX. FANTASIA GOT ERRYBODY FOOLED. LISTEN HER ALBUM COME OUT ON THE 24TH OF THIS MONTH. SHE WANT TO BOOST HER RECORD SALES FROM HER SUPPOSEDLY COMMITTING SUICIDE. IF FANTASIA REALLY WANTED TO TAKE HER LIFE SHE WOULD HAVE. I DONT BELIEVE FOR ONE MINUTE THAT SHE TRIED TO TAKE HER LIFE. IT’S FUNNY THAT SHE TOOK HER PILLS RIGHT AROUND THE TIME HER ALBUM WOULD BE RELEASED. I THINK SHE IS VERY SELFISH TO SAY THAT SHE TRIED TO TAKE HER LIFE, AND IN REALITY SHE WANTS TO GET THE WORLD ATTENTION SO WE CAN GO BUY HER ALBUM. REMEMBER FANTASIA LAST ALBUM DID NOT SELL WELL AT ALL. NOW THAT SHE HAS GOT OUR ATTENTION FROM THE “TRYING TO COMMIT SUICIDE TO SELL MUSIC” EVERYBODY WILL GO OUT AND BUY HER MUSIC. I AM AN AVID READER, AND I KNOW THIS A PUCBLICITY STUNT. EVEN THOUGH FANTASIA HAS FOUND MONEY AND FAME, SHE STILL HAS NOT FOUND HERSELF. WALKING AROUND WITH A MARRIED MAN, THAT TELLS ME THAT SHE HAS NO RESPECT FOR WHO SHE IS. SHE NEEDS TO LOVE HERSELF SO THAT EVERYTHING ELSE WILL FALL INTO PLACE. GOD HAS BLESSED THAT GURL WITH MANY THINGS, NOW SHE NEED TO GET HER AZZ OUT AND BE A ROLE MODEL TO THESE YOUNG GIRLS THAT LOOK UP TO HER. AND YOU KNOW WHAT THIS PUBLICITY STUNT AINT TRICKING ME, I STILL AINT BUYING HER ALBUM.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/Ceyisha/ Ceyisha

    WOW LOW CAN YOU GO : I MEAN NO NEWS IS GOOD NEWS. BUT I GUESS THIS WAY PEOPLE WILL FEEL SORRY FOR HER AND BUY HER ALBUM THEN HUH. I DONT FEEL SORRY FOR NO ONE WHO LETS SOMEONE BULLS**T THEM. IF DUDE WAS MARRIED THERE WERE WAYS OF FINDING OUT. BACKGROUND CHECK ANYONE. LOOK THROUGH THERE S**T. EVERYONE LIES ABOUT SOMETHING AT SOME POINT IN TIME. THING IS ARE YOU SMARTER THAN THE AVERAGE W**RING NIGGAH OR BROAD RUNNING AROUND. HIS WIFE IS DUMB ASS TOO. BUT THEIR MARRIED: WHY NOT GO AFTER THAT NO GOOD MOFO YOU MARRIED NOT THE OTHER PERSON UNLESS THAT SKANK B***H WAS TALKING S**T.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/blksouthern_belle/ blksouthern_belle

    Suicide is for people too weak to live life, and I know Fantasia is not a weak woman, May God Bless her and her Family.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/CAROLINAGIRLSRDABEST/ CAROLINAGIRLSRDABEST

    @odoggz-Just what is you on for the last few comments you been making nasty 1′s toward black women. LOL hummm im thinking your on something. And I need to come and beat you silly to get you back on track…now where send me your real address so I can pay you a personal vist. lol :)

    Now as for Fantasia’s suicide in my opinion I feel alot of people do try to kill themself and then realize they don’t really want to go that route and they just want the pain to end and fine some type of love and respect from the world rather from themself. SOME people need to REALIZE ITS YOUR LIFE and to HELL with PLEASING the FAMILY,BEST FRIENDS,FRIENDS,and the REST OF THE WORLD. Fantasia is looked at as an UGLY NOBODY in some people eyes and a home-wrecker who broke up a marriage. When really its the WIFE who is using the PEOPLE’S eye of america to JUDGE Fantasia for dating/and having SEX with her MAN that the law gave her his last name. WE don’t KNOW THE FACTS of PUALA COOKS life with her HUSBAND yet SOME OF US FEEL SORRY FOR THE WIFE. WHY? As for all WE KNOW SHE COULD BE THE BLAME FOR HER OWN BREAK UP. SOME of us are so QUICK to hop on the WOMEN side as IF she can do NO wrong. Its a big differents IF Fantasia KNEW the WIFE or was FRIENDS with her. SEEING thats not the CASE im NOT FEELING SORRY for the WIFE. She is BITTER now and want to blame Fantasia and have the people eye BASH her for HER OWN FAULT in LOOSING HER HUSBAND. If the woman don’t know you and your husband cheated…THE other woman is NOT the blame for your break up. Also WHY go after Fantasia money? When it was the HUSBAND who CHEATED and also WHO is to SAY Fantasia is the FIRST woman the husband has been with? YES I DID GO THERE!(JMO)

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/odoggz/ odoggz

    @CAROLINAGIRLSRDABEST and the rest
    What? That wasn’t cruel, and it wasn’t aimed at just black women. If someone feels they are pieces of shiite, in life, and decide to take lives because of it, let it be their own, and do it right. On the other hand, I thought we supported black women doing whatever the hell they wanted to do WITH THEIR OWN LIVES!?? Didn’t feminism teach us anything? You want to kill yourself? I support your endeavor because I’m not sexist! That’s all I’m saying. I’m not being mean, I’m just saying. How can I be mean when I was looking at the adorable, cute, little tiger cub’s Pic of the Week, in the right side of the News 1 screen, when I wrote that comment?

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/odoggz/ odoggz

    @msveevee1
    well what kind of person are YOU to wish for my death? I didn’t say I would kill myself nor tried to do so (never that), but you wish for me to do so, for your own wishes. I think that’s disgusting of you, no real black woman would say such a sordid thing, yet claim to be so righteous enough to criticize me for my comment. You’re a disgrace and mentally deranged, it seems. You typical female hypocrite.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/digg_it_up/ digg_it_up

    what can we learn?….how bout say no to drugs. drugs are for losers….

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/blksouthern_belle/ blksouthern_belle

    Odog….”I thought we supported black women doing whatever the hell they wanted to do WITH THEIR OWN LIVES!?? ”

    including suicide??? WOW..when will all these people who hate black women to the core go away?? that’s the better question. I’m fed up with this when there is Alot of non black women who are weak,have bad attitudes,golddig,are loud and ignorant I can go on all day that is not just a black woman thing and I am sick of the excessive scorn,insults,and hate for the black woman (all because she’s the backbone and last hope for black advancement—that is why we are public enemy #1 in this country and u know it). I bet his mom is not black which wouldnt surprise me with his anti-black women comments, From my personal experiences,alot of biracials with non black women mothers have a qualm with black women that I cant understand. I think it’s a mixture of hate,envy and ignorance. Being that his black father (9 times out of 10) hate his blackness would influence the mind to hate black women without any valid reasons therefore it’s ok to lump us all in one category. A nonblk woman who prob deepdown wishes to be black with a self hating negro is a recipe for disaster: a confused mixed breed who hates black women’s guts.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/TheSharperWon/ TheSharperWon

    What we can learn…”Leave MARRIED MEN ALONE.” Four words. I love the KISS method. Keep life simple people.

    Leave MARRIED MEN ALONE!
    Leave MARRIED MEN ALONE!
    Leave MARRIED MEN ALONE!
    Leave MARRIED MEN ALONE!
    Leave MARRIED MEN ALONE!
    Leave MARRIED MEN ALONE!
    Leave MARRIED MEN ALONE!
    Leave MARRIED MEN ALONE!
    Leave MARRIED MEN ALONE!

    That’s one for every day of the week and another reminder for the day that you may forget!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/odoggz/ odoggz

    @blksouthern_belle
    it’s a good thing you went to school, or else your deductive reasoning skills wouldn’t be so sharp. Oh brother…. lol

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/blksouthern_belle/ blksouthern_belle

    @Odog…LOL “good” one

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/odoggz/ odoggz

    @blksouthern_belle
    you’re forgiven. :)

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/CaliFemme23/ CaliFemme23

    I have no sympathy for this WEAK, convoluted, triflin’ female.

    There should be NOTHING on this earth that would make a woman want to LEAVE HER CHILD…
    She’s selfish and stupid for letting some NlGGA, and her tramp ass celeb status make her feel worthless enough to forget about the loyalty, responsibility, love and care her child needs.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/missstrings43/ missstrings43

    It is so sad how black people are always crying about how badly they are treated.
    And right here on this site, blacks are chatting about how they don’t feel sympathy for another black woman who they were all routing for a while back on American Idol because she was “Representing the Blackness”.

    I am ashamed of my own black community sometimes.

    Some of you all, I pray would not be standing next to me in a war, on a flight about to crash, or anywhere else another black sister or brother REALLY needing help ever is.

    Wow!!!!!

    A black sista falls short and loses her way in life…and this is the response.

    Dam!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/missstrings43/ missstrings43

    ..and one more thing….I have to agree with the Dr.

    There are sooo many married men out here who tell single women that they are single, emotionally available and the like.

    How in the hell do you really know in this day and age?

    Who tells the truth anymore?

    I think I feel in a safe place in saying that a woman can only judge a man by what he tells her and by what she is blessed enough to be able to ‘SEE”.

    So what now black people who know everything…

    And just for the record, it is in my opinion that aspirin (unless she was allergic to them) will definitely “ONLY” put her to sleep.

    And God knows …with all of this DRAMA.. she probably did need some dam sleep.

    Family, Over-opinionated black people, and Fake Friends….hell I would want to go to sleep too!

  • http://newsone.com/entertainment/newsonestaff4/fantasia-has-rendezvous-with-married-boyfriend-after-hospital-release/ Fantasia Has Rendezvous With Married Boyfriend After Hospital Release | News One

    [...] Ex-Idol Singer Fantasia Allegedly Overdoses Fantasia Makes Sex Tape With Married Man? Dr. Boyce: What We Can Learn from Fantasia’s Suicide Attempt Recommend to [...]

  • http://universalexcuses.com/fantasia-has-rendezvous-with-married-boyfriend-after-hospital-release Fantasia Has Rendezvous With Married Boyfriend After Hospital ReleaseEntertainment News & Gossips | Entertainment News & Gossips

    [...] RELATED: Ex-Idol Singer Fantasia Allegedly Overdoses Fantasia Makes Sex Tape With Married Man? Dr. Boyce: What We Can Learn from Fantasia’s Suicide Attempt [...]

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/cobitauto/ cobitauto

    I hope no one get AIDS

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/jollyroger1/ jollyroger1

    She would probably sell more ablums if she actually did kill herself.

    But this will still bring her fans out in support.

    But as a married man and listening to the comments by women here I have to say I want a divorce. You mean I can’t get nothing on the side—- ever. LOL

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/Jauharah/ Jauharah

    In the quest for love there will always be ups and downs, heartaches and heart breaks. But before we can love another person we have to love ourselves first because no one can give to us what we aren’t able to give to ourselves. We cannot define ourselves by nor through others and we sure as hell can’t let someone else define how we should be.

    People are inclined to let others down as they seek to boost themselves up and when we let them do that and then they leave we think our world is over and we simply don’t want to live anymore, as if our death will impact that other person.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/odoggz/ odoggz

    @CaliFemme23
    why isn’t anyone attacking you for being so insensitive to a female in pain? lol

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/TheSunIsBlack/ TheSunIsBlack

    how sad. what confusion! youre in my prayers

  • http://newsone.com/entertainment/casey-gane-mccalla/fantasia-admits-overdose-was-suicide-attempt-i-wanted-out/ Fantasia Admits Overdose Was Suicide Attempt “I Wanted Out” | News One

    [...] Dr. Boyce: What We Can Learn from Fantasia’s Suicide Attempt [...]

  • http://foxync.com/entertainment-news/jodiberry2/fantasia-admits-overdose-was-suicide-attempt-i-wanted-out/ Fantasia Admits Overdose Was Suicide Attempt “I Wanted Out” | FoxyNC – Foxy Hits

    [...] Dr. Boyce: What We Can Learn from Fantasia’s Suicide Attempt [...]

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/CaliFemme23/ CaliFemme23

    odoggz, Because the intellectual women know I’m right and the others know better!

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/slowhand64/ slowhand64

    What I’ve learned is that even people who have attempted suicide will use the footage in their reality tv show.

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/blazinPotPie37/ blazinPotPie37

    I don’t feel I can learn anything from the crap that she did. There are other ppl out there that are committing or attempting to commit suicide for much more serious stuff than her sitting here talking about she was tired. Ppl are dealing with loosing their jobs and not knowing how they are going to survive not that it is an excuse but still. It makes no sense for a person to want to kill themselves because of their own stupidity. She didn’t seem to want to committ suicide when she was dealing with a tough life before she won American Idol. In my opinion as I have said from the beginning I think she did that to try an gain sympathy but where was her sympathy and compassion for the woman that she did her best to hurt. Two played the game and Ms. Cook husband played a major role in the entire ordeal indeed but Fantasia knew what she was doing with no regards to this woman or the children. She is the one that needs to learn something from what she did like work on self-improvement and keep in mind that no matter how much good she does as a celebrity as soon as she does something bad she will be forever known for that

  • http://www.blackplanet.com/odoggz/ odoggz

    @CaliFemme23
    LOL Yeah I see you cracking heads, lately.

  • http://newsone.com/entertainment/samalesh/fantasia-barrino-shares-joke-about-suicide-with-tmz-paparazzi/ Fantasia Barrino Shares Joke About Suicide With TMZ Paparazzi | News One

    [...] Dr. Boyce: What We Can Learn from Fantasia’s Suicide Attempt [...]

  • http://newsone.com/entertainment/newsonestaff4/did-vh1-go-too-far-with-their-promotion-for-fantasia%e2%80%99s-new-reality-show/ Did VH1 Go Too Far With Their Promotion For Fantasia’s New Reality Show? | News One

    [...] Dr. Boyce: What We Can Learn from Fantasia’s Suicide Attempt Recommend to friends! [...]

  • http://thebeatofphilly.com/national/1003thebeat/panel-weighs-in-on-vh1s-promotion-of-fantasias-suicide-ordeal/ Panel Weighs-In On Vh1′s Promotion Of Fantasia’s Suicide Ordeal | TheBeatofPhilly – 100.3 The Beat

    [...] Dr. Boyce: What We Can Learn from Fantasia’s Suicide Attempt Share with Friends! [...]

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