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Barack Obama Benghazi, Associated Press, Tea Party

Media pundits paid to say incredibly asinine and ridiculous things about President Barack Obama (pictured) in an effort to patronize a bunch of crazy people at home with Nielsen boxes have had a hell of a week. Not surprisingly, three of the greatest offenders work for FOX News. Indeed, conservative radio host Lauren Ingraham, former Republican vice presidential nominee Sarah Palin, and actress-turned-Black-ElisabethHasselbeck Stacey Dash all tagged themselves into the fracas of foolery. And here I am to recap and mock accordingly.

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Lauren Ingraham

Speaking on “The Lauren Ingraham Show,” Ingraham not only refuted any suggestions that she’s misled people about the benefits of marijuana, but also accused the Obama administration of orchestrating some diabolical plot to keep the masses high (off their memories?) in an effort to distract them from America’s problems. Comparing it to “1984,” Ingraham argued that Obama and co. are “happy to have you all stoned up” as cost of living goes up, “illegal immigrants swap the United States,” and wages remain stagnant.

I don’t know want Lauren Ingraham is sipping and/or smoking, but you know how there’s all this news about undocumented immigrant children being caught at the border? That’s proof of border security improving.

Is it the best policy?

Not particularly, but the lack of meaningful immigration reform being passed falls on the shoulders of the House of Representatives, not the Senate and certainly not President Obama.

That said, puff-puff-pass, y’all, and let’s proceed to the next political performance artist.

Stacey Dash

Considering that her “Single Ladies” checks are long gone, one can understand why Stacey Dash would take a job as FOX News’ latest Black friend who trashes the other Blacks on their behalf. Unfortunately, Stacey Dash is to political commentary as Rihanna is to sobriety. I wish Tyler Perry (I can’t see Shonda Rhimes returning her agent’s calls) would’ve found her something to do so Roger Ailes wouldn’t have to.

While talking about the unlikely scenario that young people will get sick of President Obama trying to score them things like health care and ultimately become conservatives, she explained, “My son is going to be 24 on Friday. … He is now a conservative and he says to me, ‘Mom, most of my friends are conservative. We’re capitalists. We want to keep our money.'”

In other words, Stacey Dash made sure to raise her kids in an insulated environment with like-minded people. Here’s a shocker for you, Stacey: Most children end up like their parents as that’s how they were raised. Some will pull away based on life experiences, or in this case, pay better attention, but don’t assume that’s how the rest of the nation’s youth will go.

Meanwhile, Stacey said this about her 11-year-old daughter making fun of Obama: “And my 11-year-old is a conservative as well because she has traditions. You know, there are things that she believes in that I hope I’ve had some input on,” she said. “And, you know, she has referred to the President as gollum, which I think is really clever for an 11-year-old.”

As noted by Tom Kludt over at Talking Points Memo, Gollum is “the spindly, bug-eyed creature from ‘Lord of the Rings.’ Bless your heart, Stacey Dash. You would find that impressive.

Sarah Palin

Last and most certainly least is the herpes sore of political discourse, Sarah Palin, who is calling for the impeachment of President Obama.

The former governor of Alaska recently declared on FOX News:

President Obama’s rewarding of lawlessness, including his own, is the foundational problem here. It’s not going to get better, and in fact irreparable harm can be done in this lame-duck term as he continues to make up his own laws as he goes along, and, mark my words, will next meddle in the U.S. Court System with appointments that will forever change the basic interpretation of our Constitution’s role in protecting our rights.

It’s time to impeach; and on behalf of American workers and legal immigrants of all backgrounds, we should vehemently oppose any politician on the left or right who would hesitate in voting for articles of impeachment.

The many impeachable offenses of Barack Obama can no longer be ignored. If after all this he’s not impeachable, then no one is.

Sarah Palin wouldn’t know the law if one jumped out of a bowl of that moose chili she raves so much about and shouted, “YOU MAKE NO SENSE, WOMAN,” at her repeatedly. In theory, we should just ignore her and dismiss this as another example of Sarah Palin being Sarah Palin — ignorant, salacious, and purposeless — but as The Post’s Aaron Blake points out, “She’s the first Republican of any significant national stature to make this call. And she’s the kind of figure who could potentially recruit others to the cause — people who will want to be heard.”

Such is the reason why The Wall Street Journal, which isn’t exactly shy about being just as extreme as the aforementioned, condemned Palin’s call for impeachment in an op-ed entitled “The Impeachment Delusion.” It would be great if Sarah Palin actually read that and then sent this to Laura and Stacey in a group e-mail with the subject, “We Must Chill.” That’ll never happen, though, ’cause crazy keeps the lights on.

Michael Arceneaux blogs at thecynicalones.com, tweets at @youngsinick, and praises Beyoncé’s name everywhere he goes.

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