Well, allegedly, 21-year-old Antone Forrest Deedward Owens (pictured) of Eugene, Oregon was so eager to rub one out that he broke into several of his neighbors’ homes and surfed the web for porn over an eight-month period, KVAL-TV reports.
Between Sept. 20 and Oct. 20 of 2011, Owens’s neighbors reported break-ins to local police where someone watched porn on their computers. But the monkey-spankin’ break-ins didn’t stop there.
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In April, man arrived home to find a man in his home. He fled, but left behind some towels and porn displayed on his screen. A month earlier, a woman found porn displayed on her computer screen along with lubricant, towels and a cellphone nearby. The man was yelling from the opposite side of a sliding glass door, threatening to break down the door. When he got inside, he took his cellphone and lube from the woman and fled the scene, according to KATU-TV.
WATCH NEIGHBORS SPEAK ON HORN DOG PORN NEIGHBOR BELOW
The cops arrested Owens on Thursday for the break-in of the woman’s home. His DNA was matched to DNA samples from a towel left at the scene after Owens volunteered a swab from his cheek to local authorities.
“The suspect accessed the victim’s computer, went to a porn site, and so far in all instances mentioned he was masturbating.” said Sergeant Mitch Martin of the Eugene Police Property Crimes Unit.
KVAL-TV has more on this chicken-chocking house invader:
Owens said he is married and admitted to having a pornography addiction since high school, police said.
The break-ins occurred in a 5-block radius of Polk and Van Buren Streets, a neighborhood Owens calls home. Many residents living in the area, wishing to remain anonymous, said they are shocked that these incidents happened so close to their homes.
It is surprising to me that people break into people’s homes with that kind of knowledge in their heads.” said neighborhood resident Kevin Meehan. “It’s a shame, it’s a very dangerous game to play.”
The surfacing of these break-ins to the public has prompted many residents in the neighborhood to invest in security systems. For Meehan, he said he will rely on his dogs for security.
“There is no better security system than dogs.” Meehan said, “I’d feel bad for the guy’s family because the guy wouldn’t make it out of my house if he did that.”
Police say that Owens, in some cases, broke into and whacked off at the same house more than once. He has been charged with four counts of first degree burglary, one count of menacing and one count of coercion.
Given that Owens faces jail time, he probably would have been better off asking his wifey to help him “Raise Lazarus.”