Last February, Brandon Jackson would be sentenced to 12 years in prison by a nearly all-White jury, after being jumped by a group of White males in Jackson, N.J. Here, Brandon’s mother, Gloria Fisher, describes the void she has been experiencing each Mother’s Day without her son.
RELATED: Son Jumped By Whites, Sentenced To 12 Years: Mom Demands Justice! [VIDEO]
Mother’s Day with Brandon still incarcerated.
This is the second Mother’s Day I will spend without Brandon. This year, although I am carrying great sadness and heartbreak, I feel more encouraged.
Last year, Mother’s Day came a few weeks after Brandon was found guilty of a crime the prosecutor and judge know he did not commit.
I cried constantly — not sure if the heavy pain in my chest would ever go away.
I didn’t know who to turn to or what to do next. I kept asking, How could such obvious injustice happen? Why Brandon? Why me? How much more could I bear?
Last Mother’s Day, I went to church with my mother, as was expected. I sat numb, not hearing all of the praise and encouragement given to “good” Mothers. I felt that I had failed somehow. Somewhere along the way, I had not done whatever “it” is that makes a Mother “good.” After church, I returned home to spend the rest of that and the next few days in tears.
I cried so much that I became frustrated with my weakness.
I had considered myself a strong and fair Mother. I had been tough, but supportive. Brandon was raised to respect others. He was kind and considerate to his friends. He never had any problems with the police. Did I make him weak, easy prey? My emotions ranged between despair and rage.
Months passed before I could even open the door to his room.
So I have spent the last year trying to tell Brandon’s story. A story that too many Mothers of color share. I have a solid, strong family who have supported me emotionally, and as much as possible, financially. I have been somewhat fortunate because I have had access to the media.
How many Mother’s tears are shed alone, in silence? Mothers who are forced to accept that they can’t make a difference.
This Mother’s Day, I am encouraged.
I have spent the last year working on myself. I still cry sometimes, but I stand solid and confident in my faith. I have been broken and am renewed. I understand how blessed I am to be a member of a strong family. I thank them often.
I am confident that Brandon will be free soon. I look forward to long talks about life, past, present, and future. I still ask why did he have to lose all these years to such foolishness.
But he will return home, stronger and wiser.
I can’t wait.
Bring added joy to Ms. Fisher by wishing her a happy Mother’s Day here.
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