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Sen. Tim Scott speaks as Republican presidential hopeful Donald Trump listens during a campaign event in Concord, New Hampshire, on January 19, 2024. | Source: TIMOTHY A. CLARY / Getty

You know, I used to think South Carolina Sen. Tim Scott was boring. As I wrote previously, Scott didn’t seem to be “as cartoonishly obnoxious as Jason Whitlock or Candace Owens,” and “he doesn’t quite speak MAGA’s love language of anti-intellectualism the way Herschel Walker did,” so he wasn’t the spectacle that the aforementioned sunken place residents perpetually are. He was just a basic Black conservative with basic Caucasian-like views on racism and an even more basic point of view that Republicans are the ones who are truly discriminated against in America. Hell, Scott’s talking points were so stale and snooze-worthy that in 2023, he was still arguing that Barack Obama’s presidency proves racism is over in America. He was so generic as far as conservative politicians go that it was hard to even be offended by his wannabe-white nonsense—it just made me sleepy.

That may have changed for me around the time Scott joined Donald Trump on stage as Trump celebrated his landslide win over Nikki Haley in the New Hampshire primary, and he publicly gushed over the ex-president like he was his high school crush who keeps ignoring the love notes he stuffs in his MAGA sweetheart’s locker.

Yeah—maybe that’s the moment Tim Scott became a caricature of himself, and that’s why I now have an internal laughing track in my head every time he opens his mouth.

On Thursday, Scott might have outdone himself in terms of Trump-humping ridiculousness during a CNN interview in which he defended Trump amid the hush money trial verdict that found him guilty on a whopping 34 felony counts. During the interview, Scott was so invested in clutching hard to his MAGA massa’s bosom that he thought he was being the logical one when he demanded CNN anchor Abby Phillip take his word for it that Trump said something to him in private that contradicts what Trump provably said in public, which Scott seemed to be denying he said.

“When former President Trump says that if he is elected president, he would appoint a special prosecutor to ‘go after the most corrupt president in the history of the United States of America, Joe Biden, and the entire Biden crime family,’ are you saying that that is not something that you would support?” Phillip asked Scott.

Now, when it comes to direct questions about Trump, Scott will always put on his dodging shoes (which are also his tap-dancing shoes) and avoid the issue in favor of what sounds more like a pro-Trump campaign slogan than an actual argument. Well, this time, his reflective strategy was much simpler: he just denied reality, insulted the host and decided the only factual source relevant to the discussion was the source of “Trust me, bro.” (Essentially, he was taking the same approach his MAGA messiah takes to literally everything.)

“I’m simply saying that President Trump has said it himself: The best revenge is success,” Scott responded.

Phillip tried to interject with actual reason, saying, “Actually, senator, I have to correct you on that…,” but Scott swiftly shot back, “No, you can’t correct me on this, Abby.”

“I’m looking at the notes right here,” she persisted. “He has explicitly said that they …”

“I was actually in his presence when he said it himself,” Scott said, interrupting his host again.

“This is why the ratings on CNN are so low. The bottom line is simply this. Without question, President Trump has looked me in my eyes in a room full of other folks and said, ‘You know what? The best revenge is success.’ Let’s not make this about just Donald Trump,” Scott said.

Now, Scott…

I can’t pretend to know why CNN’s ratings are low—assuming they are—but I know it’s not because the network’s journalists prefer an official statement provably made by a presidential candidate over the word of said candidate’s dedicated lackey who is clearly in disbelief that he’s not being taken at face value.

“Senator, he may have said it to you in a private room, but he has said it to thousands of his supporters that he plans to go after his political enemies,” Abby said in another feeble attempt to serve as the voice of reason while speaking with someone who has abandoned reason altogether.

“I don’t know how you will not take my own word for what I heard with my own ears,” Scott said.

So, here, Scott has displayed Herschel Walker-level stupidity, Candace Owens-level unearned smugness, and Jason Whitlock-level tenacity when it comes to embracing unhinged whiteness. Even if he’s not less boring, he’s definitely becoming more and more what white conservatives love to see in their loyal Black conservative mascots.

Just look at this knock-off Braveheart speech he gave in response to the Trump verdict.

Scott had already compared Trump’s trial to anti-Black racism and claimed the trial was an attack by Biden and the Department of Justice despite the fact that the Biden administration is in no way responsible for bringing any state or federal charges against Trump. Now, he’s simply doubling down on his factless, illogical hyperbole, and he’s doing it with real dark-skinned Marjorie Taylor Greene energy.

Y’all don’t think that makes him at least slightly more amusing? Just me?

SEE ALSO:

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