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The One Story: HBCUs And The Gatekeeping Of Black Culture
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7/2/05 Porta potties on the Esplanade (070205pottiesrd STaff Photo by Renee DeKona saved in adv nws)

Source: MediaNews Group/Boston Herald via Getty Images / Getty

Alright, folks, we’ve seen a few great public brawls within the last year. Who can forget the WWE-style smother, scatter and chunk-o-thon between patrons and employees at a Texas Waffle House late last year? Or how about the white-nationalist-on-white-nationalist-crime battle between members of the Proud Boys and the Patriot Front in Portland earlier this year? Of course, no brawl in viral video history will ever be as iconic as the “Swing Low Sweet Chair” freedom rumble at Montgomery, Alabama’s Riverfront Park.

Well, now, there’s a new fight video making the rounds on social media that took place at a country music concert in Pittsburg, and this one was wild. It was ratchet. It was ghetto.

It wasabsolutely gross

Laaaawd, these white women are fighting outside and inside a damn porta-potty.

That’s right folks, it’s a Becky Bathroom Brawl!

It’s a Karen Kamode Kurfluffle!

It’s a Tammy Toilet Tussle!

It’s a Flushed-Out Flora-on-Flow Flogging!

It’s a Porta-Potty Pulverizing for Pale Princesses! 

I’m sorry, y’all, but nothing says “I shower bi-weekly, don’t wash my legs and think a dip in a public pool counts as a bath” like people who care so little about sanitation that they’re willing to roll around and possibly create open wounds inside a community urine and fecal matter receptacle. You just know the lice in their hair have lice in their hair now.

Anyway, according to the Daily Mail, the whole thing took place Wednesday at a Morgan Wallen concert at the Pittsburgh Pirates’ stadium, PNC Park. Now, I actually don’t know who Morgan Wallen is, and, honestly, ever since Jason Aldean put out his lynching soundtrack banger “Try That in a Small Town,” I’ve been wary about even sticking my pinky toe down the country music rabbit hole.

All I know is that while Wallen was on stage singing whatever songs he sings, the nastiest white women in Pittsburg were outside singing “Try That in a Porta-Potty” while cleaning the facility’s walls with their own hind parts.

Anyway, let’s get into a quick rundown of what happened in the video.

From the Daily Mail:

In the video, which has been shared on social media, two women can be seen arguing outside a row of red porta pottys.

One of them can be heard saying: ‘F*** you. You do not cut in front of me.’

Quickly, the argument turns violent as they begin grabbing at one another before one of them manages to push the other backwards into the toilets.

A bystander who was exiting one of the portable toilets at the time can be seen looking shocked as the two tussle.

Another woman then joins in on the fight as it moves into one of the toilets, with the two of them now pinning the other woman down.

Seemingly out of nowhere, another woman turns up on the scene and begins pulling the two women from on top of the other.

Grabbing one of them by the hair, she viciously punches the woman in the face as a man tries to extinguish the situation.

The melee eventually quietens down as more people move in to split up the fighting parties.

Honestly, I just feel sorry for this lady:

Imagine trying to exit the portable feces collector after spending God knows how much time squatting over a toilet seat (I have it on good authority that women don’t sit all the way down in porta-potties) only to be pushed back down onto that seat by brawlers who seemingly went out of their way to take the fight inside of the pee and poo-saturated bacteria container. (Actually, I’m pretty sure these women do sit all the way down on those toilets.)

According to TMZ, no arrests have been reported as of yet, and if we don’t hear about any of these women leaving that concert in handcuffs, then we can speculate that white privilege even extends to Caucasians who smell like septic tanks. It reminds me of all the white people who complained about Aldean’s song getting “canceled” while no one complains about rap music. Well, not only has rap music been complained about for literal decades, but when Black folks fight at rap concerts arrests tend to be made swiftly.

Then again, if I was a cop, I’m not getting close enough to these stankin’ Stellas to slap cuffs on them, and they’re damn sure not getting into my car.

Folks on social media were also just as grossed out as they were amused.

Y’all, there were tens of thousands of people using those porta-potties. This is just damn nasty.

SEE ALSO:

NYC Subway Fight Video Shows Irate Passenger Brutally Assault Man Who Fell ‘Asleep On His Shoulder’

After Violent Howard University ‘Fight Club’ Video, HBCU Strengthens Campus Security